Thursday, December 20, 2012

Pictures and Statues.

Every end of the year there is this thing on the news channels and blogs of 2012 of the best movies/pictures/scandals/boring other shit.

So, because I follow the herd as well, I shall do a post of all the pictures I didn’t post during the year.

These pictures I found either too nonsensical/stupid/irrelevant.

IMG_2603

We start with the ‘occupy/vegetarian/help the refugee crowd tucking into a hearty breakfast after a hard night of squatting under the bridge.

With their gasoline generators powering all their Apple computers and keeping the beers cold, they really made a difference to all the unwashed and downtrodden of the world.

IMG_2609

This picture give new meaning to the phrase of “climbing the walls” and has  nothing to do with his wife putting him on rations.

Many men climb walls when they on rations.

IMG_2160

I was cycling, and I came across this drain pipe that someone had purposely put there.

It was the pink that interested me.

Who would paint their drainpipe  pink?

A chick?  A gay guy? A colorblind person?

Ambience in the bathroom?

Does pink actually look nice in candle light?

So many important questions.

IMG_4030

I was walking along one day and I though for a second I was in Africa.

Alas, ‘twas not an eagle, merely a sticker.

High up on a building.

Like on the tenth floor.

Who thinks up this stuff ?

Germans are weird that way. They stick bird stickers on windows and many have statues of crows perched on their balconies.

It’s quite disconcerting because some of them are very life like, so you forever looking at it and waiting to see if it moves or not.

And after you stared at the crow statue for a while, the people look down on you and they think you some wacko peeping tom.

Then the cops come and arrest you and you get ten months in jail for voyeurism and as a bonus you lose your virginity there as well.

This can causes you to question your sexuality, and you then could divorce your wife and marry a wanna- be Elton John.

Elton John likes to put statues of crows out on his balcony and the whole cycle starts again with some one else.

My conclusion is that crow statues break up marriages.

IMG_3188

This is German graffiti.

It is also incorrect.

The reason it is that everybody started sucking instead of fucking, the human race would be extinct in about a hundred years.

Not a good thing at all.

IMG_2156

Some joker had painted this statues winkie with gold paint.

But I didn’t want to take a to a close up picture, because then every body thinks I’m wacko and then I might lose my wife and virginity and we wouldn’t want that to happen, now would we ?

IMG_1561

This is a unique picture.

I captures the last recorded ray of sunlight in Europe for 2012

I sent it to the Smithsonian so they could display it in their museum but they told me this was the four hundredth picture I had sent them, and if I send another picture to them they would call the cops.

And we all know what happens then, don’t we?

They really ungrateful too.

IMG_3595

Back in the old days in South Africa, this would be known as a Zef car.

It’s the tape that does it for me.

Reminds me of cheeseburgers at the local drive inn at Fountains in Pretoria in the seventies.

A drive in, ( for non South Africans) is a place where you go watch movies while sitting  in your car.

We used to go in my kombi bus and park in the back.

Lots of times, and we didn’t even care what movie was showing.

( This is long before the Anne era)

That way we could eat cheeseburgers, drink booze, smoke dope and screw to our hearts content and no one even knew.

IMG_8252

It is patently obvious to me that the local government reads my blog.

Because the next day after I wrote my little opinion piece of the green bushwhacked cop, these gentlemen came to paint these lines on the road.

IMG_8387

Cool. Now, at least, when some one parks there, they know matata will come down the line.

IMG_8397

Yep, ‘ol Schpeckles has got a buddy.

A she.

Called Tjilip, because that is the sound she makes.

He’s scared of her.

It is a good thing to be scared of  females, he says, because they are the stronger sex, and  he personally  can’t wait for them to take over the world and be done with it.

Anyway, that’s what he told me one day, and I believe him.

Post a Comment